Tuesday, December 21, 2010

No Sleep for the Weary

Y'know, if it's not one thing, it's another.

Last week, Evan threw up on the off-white living room carpet...after eating blackberries.  Everyone talks about how blueberries are so staining, but no one ever mentions blackberries.  Luckily, the giant purple stain came out and it was one of those non-repeated fluke pukes.

And then I caught the stomach bug from you-know-where.  By day three of consuming nothing but miniscule sips of water and tiny bites of saltines, I thought I was going to die.  I never had a fever and thankfully no one else caught it, but for a while there in my delusional mind, I thought for sure that somehow I'd contracted some mutant combination of rotovirus/cholera that was going to land me in the hospital.  But, hey, I'm five pounds lighter now, so why should I complain, right?

And now, on top of his recent and on-going medical issues, Ryan has a terrible cold.  As I type this at 6 something in morning, he is snoring like a freight train (and has been since 4 something), which is about twenty times louder than your usual run-of-the mill train-type snoring.  I'm lucky that I got to sleep so much during my bout with the stomach bug because I'm sure as heck not going to sleep again any time soon.

I'd go sleep in the living room, but a) it's adjacent to our bedroom and I can still hear him snoring through the door (yes, it's that loud) and b) he's been diagnosed with a slight case of apnea (which might be causing the seizures) so I spend most nights just dozing and making sure that he's breathing and not sleeping on his back.  So I guess it's not like I've been getting lots of sleep anyway.

The doctors said we should look into having his tonsils taken out and that might alleviate the apnea issues and in turn that might lower his chances of having more seizures.  We thought about waiting a bit so that we can get through Evan's tear duct surgery next month (yes, yet another medical issue!), but as I listen to him snore so deeply that the bed is shaking right along with him, I'm tempted to go find a kitchen knife and perform the surgery on him myself.

Don't get me wrong, I love him more than life itself, but y'know, I need to sleep.  I haven't had a good night's rest in nearly a month and clearly it's taking a toll on my mood and my sanity.  Not even Christmas can get me out of this grouchy mood.  Now that's pretty sad.


  1. You are hilarious. I'm reading along, thinking oh no, poor Jana. It's just been one thing after another.

    Then I get to the part where you're going to "go find a kitchen knife and perform the surgery on him"...I just about spit milk out of my nose. I think I'll keep giggling about that for a while.

    Have a Merry Christmas!

  2. We had Clay's tonsils and adenoids removed because he was snoring like an old man and had other parasomnia issues. I hope that will work for Ryan. Another tear duct surgery for Evan? Yuck! It sounds like your holidays have been as joyful and triumphant as ours have and as much as I love you, as much as I hate to hear that y'all are sick, I am kind of glad to be in such wonderful company. Here's hoping that things start to brighten up for both of us!! Merry Christmas to you and yours :)

  3. Tien said...

    I felt like shouting, "Serenity now, serenity now," Seinfeld style after reading this. December must have been a tough month (sorry just getting caught up on my blog reading now). I hope everyone is feeling better and you are getting more sleep!