Friday, August 6, 2010

A Letter to my Children

My Dearest Children,

Your father and I have such dreams for you and your futures.  As your parents, we worry about you and we worry about the choices we're making on your behalf.

Our job as parents is not to make you happy all of the time.  Our job is to turn you into responsible and productive adults.  With that in mind, please take note of the following:

* This household is not a democracy.  It is a benevolent dual-dictatorship, the dictators being your father and myself.  We welcome your opinions on various matters and we will take them into account, but we will make the final decisions regarding pretty much everything.

* Whining is not attractive.  If you don't like what I cook for dinner, then don't eat it, but don't ask for something else, either.  You've heard the phrase, "Beggars can't be choosers", right?  Well, your lack of income means you are perpetual beggars and therefore do not have the right to be picky about the food we serve you.

* When you are old enough, you will learn how to do most of the household chores.  Scrubbing toilets, washing and folding clothes, mopping the kitchen floor and mowing the lawn are not beneath you.  When you become adults and have households of your own, you can choose to spend your money on housekeepers or yard crews, but for now, you'll learn to do it yourselves.

* You will learn to pick up after yourselves.  If you spill your drink, you will grab a towel and clean it up.  If you drop food on the floor, you will throw it in the trash and wipe up the floor.  I am not your own personal maid and will not do things that I know you are capable of doing yourself.  Also, I may ask you to help pick up a mess someone else made.  I know it's not fair, but y'know, this is a family and sometimes we have to do that kind of stuff.

* The world does not owe you anything and you shouldn't expect it to.  Honesty, hard work and perseverance will get you the things you want.  You might not get them when you want, but they will come.  Delayed gratification is a lost art in this country, but trust me, you will appreciate things more if you earned them yourself.

* You are no better than anyone else.  Your gender, skin color, religion, social class and level of education do not make you to superior to people who are different from you.  And if I hear about you saying or doing anything to the contrary, you better watch out.

* On a similar note, no one is better than you, either.  You are perfect just the way God made you and if your so-called friends begin to treat you with disrespect or as if you're not as good as them, it's time to make some new friends.

* Please marry whoever you think will make you happiest.  Your father and I don't care about their race, social background or gender.  If they treat you with respect, can support you when times are rough and make you happy, go for it.  We will love whoever you love.  (One exception: a convicted serial killer.  I don't know that we'll be that open and accepting.)

* Lastly, we will love you no matter what.  We may not agree with some of the decisions you make, but as long as we know you made those decisions for yourself, we will love you.

Love Always,


  1. Oh, I like this so much I might just print it out and adopt it for our family! If that's ok, of course. Love it!

  2. I agree with Sarah!! Very nice Jana :)

  3. Love this, Jana! It's wonderful!