Thursday, June 5, 2008

Help Wanted

Wanted: Night Nanny/Wet Nurse

Start Date: Immediately

End Date: When baby is sleeping through the night (optimistic end date: January 2009, pessimistic end date: never)

Duties: To get up and feed 3 week old from the hours of 10 pm to 7 am. Number of feedings per night may vary from two to four. Most nights will require feedings at 11 pm, 1 am, 3 am and 5 am. Nursing is required (no formula for the first two months or so). Cleaning up spit-up after each feeding is required. Speaking English is NOT required, but willingness to change diapers after feedings a plus. Please be aware that the baby is a poop machine and will require several diaper changes each night.

Salary: Negotiable....say room/board/food and our undying affection? Extra ice cream provided in exchange for light (and quiet) housekeeping and laundry services.

Benefits: Unlimited time to sleep during the hours of 7 am until 11 pm (provided you can sleep through newborn and toddler noise all day). All meals provided (we hope you like casseroles and cold cereal). Nursing creams, bras and pads also provided upon request.

Any takers?

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