If I were an inventor, these would be my next few projects:
* Chauffeur's windows in minivans so that when the crying/screaming/whining gets to be too much, parents can simply push a button and isolate the noise.
* Teeny-tiny garters to hold up baby socks.
* A fridge lock that a two year old can't figure out and/or break within 24 hours of installment.
* Little screens for the backs of vehicles that display messages like "Quit Tailgating Me!" and "Please Turn Your Blinker Off".
* A school bus GPS tracking/parent alert system that lets parents know exactly when they need to leave the house to get a child off the bus (and thus help them feel less guilty about leaving two napping children in the house while they wait at the corner).
* Diet, caffeine free soda that truly tastes just as good as the real thing.
* A kitchen floor that somehow repels the spills, crumbs and various vegetables that children launch from their plates and bowls.
* A magic potion to stop time so that parents can keep their children in a favorite developmental stage forever.
How about you? Anything you'd like to see invented?
3 weeks ago